Conversation On Being Female

Being female is not so easy to put into words though some of us did well on the posters below. Whenever anyone asked me what we would talk about since the conversation is about being female, I usually said we would talk about the good, the bad and the very real. It is a very broad topic and will not stop if conversations happened daily. Each female is unique because of our genetics and environment coupled with the experiences that shape us, being female is very nuanced and so often its contradictory and situational. Women are powerful but a few of us see where the power lies, I believe that the privilege and ability to have humanity continue is THE power. but more than that it charges us with socialising the future, to shape thoughts and therefore action, this means that we can change the world. We can only achieve this if we see this as the truth and act with this as the guide, the beacon, path and the final destination, so that regardless of the method used the end point is the same.

We must recognise and believe this truth.


The children pointed out that they hate unhealthy comparison, it discourages them. Each child is unique and therefore wants to be treated in a unique way.

 They also pointed out that parents should stop lying about their pasts, by saying they always came first when they were kids, it mounts pressure on them to appear perfect.

 They do not want parents to force them to be better than someone else but to support them to be better than they were the previous years.

Parents need to start parenting and treating children as the children are not as the parents want them to be.

 Parents should point out reasons to the child when they make them do or not do certain things, not to use certain things as threats.

 The same society that can influence your child negatively can equally influence them positively so parents should learn to involve trusted individuals.Parents should reinforce guidelines, set rules and regulations and ensure obedience.

 Parents should spend quality time with children, when you give them tasks, monitor them and ensure they do it.Parents should also lay emphasis on who the child becomes and not on what.

When children ask questions, don’t shove them off, give them age appropriate information.

Lastly, teach children to care for others, teach them to genuinely feel someone else’s pain.


Aishatu Abubakar-Abdullateef is a Child and Adolescent Psychiatrist, pioneer female from Northern Nigeria in this specialty.

She is also a researcher and advocate for the promotion of mental well-being among children and adolescents.

Works with school teachers to raise mentally healthy kids by helping them understsnd the basis of child behaviour in classrooms.

She has worked with ABUTH for 12 years and is the North-West Regional Representative of the Association for Child and Adolescent Psychiatry and Allied Professionals in Nigeria (ACAPAN).


Abdullahi Bello Umar FNIM, CMP, FCE Founder, MindZone Ltd Abdullahi holds a Bsc and an MBA from Bayero University, Kano and Ahmadu Bello University, Zaria in Nigeria respectively; he is currently a Doctoral candidate of the Swiss Management Center University and an Adjunct Faculty Member of the Kaduna Business School. He is a Fellow and Chartered Management Practitioner of the Nigerian Institute of Management (NIM); a Fellow of the Institute of Chartered Economists and an Accredited Trainer of the Centre for Management Development. He is a World Bank trained Facilitator for the International Finance Corporation’s BusinessEdge programme and the pioneer African Global Licensed Instructor & Expert in Mind Mapping with Opengenius, Wales. He passionately advocates mental literacy, namely: mindmapping, creativity, wholebrain thinking, accelerated learning etc. through his firm – MindZone Ltd.

Namse Udosen is a teacher and Educational development expert. He has a Master’s degree in Education and is currently enrolled for a PhD in Education.
He writes children’s literature is particularly interested in literacy development as a means to educational success.
He is the author of Fundamental Etiquette for Young Nigerians.

I am a grateful mother of four and a Jigawian to the core. My passion for educating young minds unexpectedly landed me in an environment that revealed an inner strength. I lead and teach a group of exceptional teachers nurturing the spirit and intellect of children. I appreciate good gardening and landscaping, enjoy volunteer work and love to read motivational self help books. I also like to write pieces about making sense of this confused world of ours. I am in love with love itself and believe the epitome of love is that between man and the creator. I will want to be remembered as one who touched the lives of many positively and benefitted human kind and other creations.

Articulate, hardworking, well spoken, disciplined, reliable, passionate, with good interpersonal skills, my life is strongly shaped by the universal values and my faith; my experience in management has spanned 2 decades (mostly in top management positions). I understand the need for and am committed to continuous personal and professional development. I imbibe qualities of good time keeping, planning/organisation, hard work, following the rules, setting high standards, expressing myself and demanding for my rights and that of others. I believe in and practice leadership by example and inclusion and nurturing others to enable them to be the best that they can be and providing a conducive working environment to ensure successful outcomes.
I have a Master of Arts in Islamic Banking, Finance and Management | Gloucestershire University awarded, United Kingdom. Bachelor of Science in Business Studies and Sociology | Surrey University awarded, United Kingdom.Ordinary National Diploma, Business Administration | Padworth College Reading, United Kingdom. Diploma in Marketing | Institute of Marketing, United Kingdom.Post Graduate Diploma in Islamic Banking and Insurance | IIBI, London, United Kingdom.Associate, Chartered Institute of Insurance | Chartered Institute of Insurance, Sevenoaks, United Kingdom.Certificate in Counselling and Addiction Counselling | Institute of Counselling,Scotland, United Kingdom.Certificate of Achievement in Understanding Addiction | Kings College , London, United Kingdom.Certificate of Corporate Governance in Fiduciary Duties | Nigeria Stock Exchange. Certificate in Corporate Governance | INSEAD, Business School of the World, France.
My work experience began as a management trainee with the Nelson Hurst International Brokers in London, then the pioneer underwriter of Medical insurance at IGI Insurance Company Limited in Lagos. I was the first Executive Director Finance and Administration and later Managing Director of Turners Building Products (Arewa) Limited in Kaduna.
A Certified Clarity 4D trainer; the first Independent Director of NAHCO (Nigerian Aviation Handling Company). Owner , The Recovery Place and founder, House of Recovery. Consultant on Drug abuse to the Northern Governors Wives Forum (NGWF)
Member of the Institute of Directors of Nigeria. Co founder and trustee of Al amanah FoundationA trustee of Kaduna International School; Mariacutty Foundation, a youth empowerment organisation; WIC Foundation; a partner in C Clear Consulting, an educational consultancy. A Tony Elumelu Entrepreneurship Programme mentor; facilitator and mentor, YEN (young entrepreneurs network).

Some of my interests include writing, reading, good food, swimming, travelling to new and exciting places, meeting people and charity work.I come from Bauchi state and live in Kaduna.

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